I'm scared

Little boys don't have a problem saying " I'm scared."

What happens as they get older?

Normally I am the first one to cream my cousin's husband.

He lazy, he doh help. He not interested in the kids.

But over the last year, well....

the truth is

in generational terms... they didn't grow up with examples of fathers that well...

did stuff like that..

and they are struggling with coming to terms with...

being different.

I always thought being a lesbian meant that kids was out of the question.

And Iz not really feminine.

But I don't know, it must be hormones or something.

I turn 30 and find ... 

I don't want to be mother, Auntie will suffice.

But the kid thing.

Something inside me just wants to give back... legacy I suppose.

Uhmmm....

It is sad to say... I think I am becoming ... my aunt.